Have you ever had one of those moments where you say all that you have to say, you scream and yell, kick and punch all the random words in your head? U speak with no reservations, no prohibitions just free flowing raw words. Straight from your heart no filters to seive through only the politically correct.
You think its clear because you understand it and because you can see the picture the words paint.
Is it ever possible that those same words described can be misunderstood? Is there another method of communication where the receiver of the message would get exactly that which is intended to be communicated?
Mraz wrote in his lyrics “did u get my message? did they bend? did they break from the flight that they take and come back together with a whole new meaning and sense completely unrelated to the one i sent?”
Is there anything more frustrating then that of an misunderstood message? Or maybe the receiver refuses to understand the message? I mean look at little children, because they’re young and innocent therefore how can u be really angry with them? Maybe people who have a complicated message refuses to understand the message just to simpliy their obligations towards the sender of the message.
Is it the obligation of a boyfriend to understand his girlfriend and know what makes her happy and what makes her cry? Is it his obligation to treat her in a way that makes her proud of who she is? Is it also the responsibility of the boyfriend to hear the girlfriend and put her feelings, love and metaphysics above that of his?
Is there ever a love in which the boyfriend hurts the girlfriend because he is ignorant? But if hes ignorant then how can he claim to love?

How come its so hard to walk away from something that is so unforefilling? It seems as though you’re an independant and strong person but then a situation like this arises and you find ure self unable to walk away.
Where do u gather the courage to walk away? Do you have to hurt the other person just to save yourself?

I’ve got an exam tomorrow and after staying up till odd hours trying to finish the 2 major assignments that are due tomorrow, I find myself tossing and turning unable to rest my brain.
I thought my trusty studying-all-nighter friend cheazles was going to still be on, battling through her stats assignment, but no shes gone probably fast asleep dreaming of pleasentries.

I wanna these thoughts on marriage and how 2 people who seem to have no chemistry at all decide to marry, and what does it say about humans by nature and humans by nurture.

It’s not very often in our lives where we come across people who inspire us to love, or smile, or act horribly whitty.
I mean the opposite isnt a rarity, like the man driving up Watervale Blv today, pissed the fuck outta me to the point where I was swearing and cursing his mother behind my wheel. Like the person who shares your living space but doesnt feel responsible for his own mess, and is the fucking laziest person in the fucking world, and all that he does is eat, sleep, want to have sex and every now and then goes to work. Those are the people that inspire you to hate… not only hate them, but hate everything around them and you and the world. So it’s safe to assume that inspiration is a strong value.

I recently met an individual who through only an hour I have derived at the conclusion, that he is an amazing person. Now if anyone reading this knows me, then they will know how cynical and hateful I am most of the time.
Well I guess hateful isnt really the word but I dislike a lot of people. I think most people are ungenuine and there is always a condition attached to every action they have. But once in a while I would lable someone as amazing, and to me that is well quite ‘amazing’
For instance, when Mostha was my best friend and loved me as close to unconditionally as possible I thought he was pretty amazing. When I travelled half way across the world and met a friend I thought he was pretty amazing. And yesterday I met a young man who I think is very amazing. I have never met someone who made me laugh from my heart, really laugh. Not laugh because I’m just being courteous, which I do alot. There isnt alot of funny people out there.
You know when they say in the movies/poems/books ‘the room was filled with people, but when we looked at each other it was like there was only the two of us.” Thats exactly how it was….. it wasnt because of the way he looked, or the nice clothes, nor was it has fat watch, it was his words…. the combination of words…..the sparkle in his eyes…..the cheeky smile, the hand gester. It was like at that moment someone understood me and my nerdy sense of humour, without me needing to say a word….. not a whisper…..just pure understanding, no artifical colours or flavours.
Finally, I had found someone who understands me, someone who really gets my language.

So why do I sigh knowing that this individual who I think so highly of will never be anything other than a shadow, a whimpering thought in my mind?
Can he share a life with another? Does he understand her like he understands me?
Do we marry because it is the right time in our lives, our artifical superficial life, or do we marry the one we really love. Not love because they make us feel comfortable, but love because no matter what they can make us smile, the smile that runs from your toes to the top of your head.
I wonder if she does that for him, I wonder if he really loves her because she is everything that I cannot be, or did he marry her because he never knew that something that she can never be was out there?

It’s clear, clear that I cannot share my life with someone who lies next to me but doesnt hear the tears and screams. I could never be inspired to love intensly by one who eats, sleeps and eats again, one who has no responsibilty to himself, no purpose to grace the earth. He who doesnt live, only merely existing.

I cannot live in my own shadow too scared to be all of me, because of the fear of over shadowing the other. Its time to break out and break free. Its time to be best that one can be.

xox godess