And so 2009 has rolled around with a blink of an eye, little seems to have changed but so much has changed without one even noticing. For one I’ve realised reluctantly that I am indeed a fob. I’ve realised how much i enjoy talking viet to the random shop owners in Footscray and Richmond, especially the ones that own the music and book shops. I really had to accept that I was a fob after I was heard ranting on about a ca luong performed by Phi Nhung and Manh Quynh, which the video lady didnt even know existed. 

And now in the comfort of my own home, I’m listening to Minh Tuyet sing about her broken heart and how she lives with one person whilst in love with another. Maybe I can relate but then maybe I cant either way I feel an emotional pang near my heart. I think these feelings qualify me as a fob. 

Further from this realisation and self classification I have started a hardcore fitness regime. Hardcore defined in my life as actually doing something… This may differ from person to person but my definition is rather liberal and unconfined. I’ve started walking/running around the ‘tan’. Now to the fit and cool people they’ll know that it is the Melbourne Botanical Gardens. I love that place. A few weeks ago I ran into the Richmond Football Club training for the up-and-coming season. I screamed so loud  my friend had to punch me in the face and tell me to ‘calm the fuck down!’. Then the following day I was running along side tank, hot, tan and sweaty Melbourne Storm players. Whoa… double whoa… eye candy overload. I’ve realised though that most people go for a job around the ‘tan’ because of the potential eye candy. This theory was proven (proven through my objective observation of a sample group of around 100 men and women…) because regardless of who you ran pass and who ran pass you, you would both look at each other. It wasnt the acknowledgment hello kinda look. It was the “I’m checking you out” look. For instance if I ran pass someone who was hot we would look at each other and then I would smile at them. At times they would return my gesture with a flirty smile of their own… some would even jog backwards to elongate our ‘check out’. But then there would be times when I would look at a fellow runner and smile upon our eye contact to get nothing. And sometimes someone would smile, for me to quickly look away or down at my eye pod. Anything to avoid eye contact after I’ve judged them ‘not worthy’. This theory isn’t only relevant to me, I’ve been the third party observer on others doing the same thing to each other. 

This new theory has brought me to another random thought. Can men and women or can men or women ever stop checking each other out. I shared this random thought with a few of my wise and not so wise friends to see if they could elaborate on it. This is what they had to say;

Friend 2231 (female, mid 20’s in a serious relationship, a teacher): I think men are more likely to check out women, and I think they’re more likely to check out other chicks if they’re in a serious relationship or married. It’s just in their nature. They have the need to produce and look for women who they would like to produce with. It’s almost instinctive. 

Friend: 8971 (female, mid 20’s, in a serious relationship, work-shy): I never really check out any one other than my fiance. Why would I go out for burgers if I have steak at home? 

Friend 3654 (male, late 20’s, not in a relationship, management): My mates who are in relationships tend to check out chicks more. But they never do anything about it. They’re just window shopping. I’ll check out a chick if she’s eye catching, for example if she has a devilish laugh or a mouth watering smile. The ones that last aren’t necessarily the ones that you would ‘check out’ on the street though. 

Friend 007 (male, mid 30’s, married, dentist): I check out chicks and I secretly think about them, but I love my wife and kids too much to do anything about it. I think there’s no harm in looking. 

So it seems that my small sample of subjects supports the fact that people will check out others regardless of their relationship status, but a majority wouldn’t jeopardise their relationship by taking it to the next level. 

It’s interesting, although let me pose another questions. What if the attraction was more than looks or a superficial element, what if the attraction was personal, one person to another. A connection of the mind or soul? Would that make a difference in the approach taken by an individual. Would it be a good idea to let go of a good and safe relationship to attempt another based on a an attraction of ideals and views on the world? 

Let me know your thoughts?

godess

xox